Found On Craigslist: "Shitmobile" Edition

"Justin Hughes" (justinhughes54) 10/27/2016 at 15:16 • Filed to: None

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You can’t make this stuff up.

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

Link appears Kinja’d, so here’s the text of the ad:

Hey, im a piece of shit and this is my real life shitmobile. This is not a joke, im trying to sell this because i havent had a license for almost a year and ive still been driving it around or letting other people drive while im gone and its been acrewing tickets. i need to sell this to pay tickets to get my license back.

it runs and drives, ive always givin it regular oil changes and taken good care of it whenever i had money and was around. its a great car thats going to take a lot of work to be inspectable. it does qualify for antique plates though.

the good thing about the car is the engine, its a beast. really the most reliable car ive ever had. the frame is also solid and pretty rust free.

the bad, and theres a good amount. the two main problems are the massive hole behind the passenger seat, and the fact the muffler fell off and theres just a straight pipe.
Other problems include, 1 patched tire, 1 working window, slow coolant leak, none fuctioning windshield wipers (ive been using shoelaces tied to the wipers) , cloth ceiling falling down, emergency brake line broken, and your regular old dents and surface rust.

i really love this car and wish i had enough money to fix it up, or turn it into a demolition derby car, or maybe weld it up into some sort sweet mad max looking drivable art piece. But im broke and the state is keeping me that way.

text or call with your offers i am open to trades as well. wouldnt mind having a dirtbike, or a bunch of green. i know its trimm season.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:17

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How much?

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:18

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Let me guess: “Asking $3,000.”

Justin Hughes > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 10/27/2016 at 15:19

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$600. “i am open to trades as well. wouldnt mind having a dirtbike, or a bunch of green. i know its trimm season.“

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:23

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NP. Now that Kinja’s showing the link, I think this would make for a good story-car because that’s one of the most legit CL ads ever. There’s no way that car’s worth less than $600 in clicks.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:27

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Holy shit, it just keeps getting better! Those are beer cans on the floor!

Justin Hughes > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 10/27/2016 at 15:39

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$600, dirt bike, or “a bunch of green.”

Takuro Spirit > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:42

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I’d love to have something that looks just like this on the outside, but has a healthy motor and suspension underneath it just to troll the shit out of people.

My wife would hate it, the kids wouldn’t want to be dropped off at school in it.... it’s be PERFECT.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:45

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Missing title, but holy fuck this is great.

Monkey B > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:45

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I had a gold 77 Delta 88 2 door. What a great car, the bench seat was great for things...

shop-teacher > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:51

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The ‘80-’85 Delta 88 coupes like these are one of my favorite cars of all time. My mom had one new, and we loved it. If I ever find a clean one, especially in dark blue, I’m buying it. This one ... well, it ain’t the one!.

Justin Hughes > Monkey B 10/27/2016 at 15:57

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My dad had a tan ‘85 Delta 88 4-door. And an ‘88 88 after that.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 15:57

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The Ultimate Shitbox Machine

Urambo Tauro > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 16:34

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I drove an ’84 4-door for a while. It had a 305 and was BROWN.

Tristan > Justin Hughes 10/27/2016 at 18:52

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“I’m a piece of shit”

“haven’t had a license for a year”

“need to sell this to pay tickets”

“wouldn’t mind having... a bunch of green”

That first statement checks out.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Takuro Spirit 10/27/2016 at 19:23

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If I had this thing, I’d need to make it a noise soundtrack I could make it play outside and install a water fogger in the trunk to put down a righteous trail of “smoke”.

The Stig's former college room mate > Justin Hughes 10/28/2016 at 08:50

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His shitmobile looks a lot like the shitmobile my friend drove in high school. except his was a 4 door.

His shitmobile originally had the 231 V6 in it, which was not really adequate to climb the hills to his house. Shortly after he bought it, it received a 455 swap. Still had working cruise control and AC after. Somehow during the swap, the feature that prevented the cruise from engaging below 30 mph was lost. So you could set the cruise at 55, come to a complete stop, hit “resume” and the car would dump the 4 barrell and rocket back to 55 at wide open throttle, smoking the shit out of the right rear tire.

The pillow-top seats were awesome in that thing. it was like driving your grandmother’s sofa.